It's easy to think that only adults have rights, but as a child, you also have rights, especially regarding you and your family. Here's a list of the most important things you are entitled to.
Children have the right to be with their parents without arguments and fights. Some children live with both parents, while others live with one parent and visit the other when possible (proximity matters here). It’s the parents' job to ensure that the child spends time with both parents if they are good parents who are well and capable of taking care of the child. If living far apart, FaceTime calls can be a good option.
Parents need to explain why things are the way they are so that the child can understand their own life. This doesn’t mean that a child needs to hear all the details about what happened between adults. But adults should try to explain in a way that suits the child and makes life easier to understand.
If children have an opinion about what happens to them, they have the right to voice it, and adults need to listen. This doesn’t mean things will always go the way the child wants, but the child always has the right to be heard. It often takes courage to express what you want or think, especially if you’re afraid of disappointing one or both parents. But it’s the parents’ job to handle disappointment. It’s more important for children to express their opinions than for parents not to feel disappointed. Children's needs come first!
When adults are angry with each other, they might speak badly about each other in front of the child. This is often distressing for children. Adults need to find another way to talk. If this happens, you can say, "I don’t want to hear this. Stop saying mean things about Mom/Dad/another important adult."
Children have the right to feel good and safe. It is forbidden for adults to hit children or otherwise harm them. It’s also forbidden to say mean things to children. If this happens, it’s important for the child to get help from trusted adults, like the other parent, family members, a teacher, or a coach. If the adult doesn’t seem to listen or understand, it’s important to talk to another adult. Children have an absolute right not to be hit or mistreated while growing up. ❤️
Malin Bergström Child Psychologist, Associate Professor & Author
4 September 2024
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